Choosing Joy


2019 did not start out the way I expected. We had some pretty difficult things to walk through as a family, and to say it was rough would be a understatement.

I heard a quote recently that really resonated with me; “It is not happy people who are thankful, It is thankful people who are happy.”

See, despite circumstances in my life I have to wake up every day and make a conscious choice to be thankful and a conscious decision to be happy.

I think we have become this society where we expect our kids, spouse, job and sometimes even friends to be our happiness and then we are disappointed when they let us down. I know I know, its hard to say things like this don’t fill my bucket.

When we expect the  people we love to fill our bucket, we are putting unrealistic expectations on them which not only sets them up or failure but it puts a significant strain on these relationships in our life.

My kids cannot be my source of joy. My husband cannot be my source of joy. My friends cannot be my source of joy.

Now I’m not saying go all Marie Kondo and get rid of everything that doesn’t spark joy- it may work for material things but don’t try it on your family LOL!

As a mom, I would say we spend most of our days filling others buckets before we fill our own. It’s our nature. But the truth is, if we don’t put our own oxygen mask on we can’t help others. I’m not talking about going on extravagant trips or salon trips every weekend- what mother of 4 has time for that?!?! But what are some things you can do to help you choose joy and fill your bucket?

Waking up and making the conscious decision to be happy can be life changing. No, I’m not just putting on rose colored glasses but instead choosing to be positive… choosing to be happy when things are hard and my circumstances aren’t what I expected them to be.

Just start with one thing each day before you get out of bed, and before you know it, it will be a habit each morning of starting the day being happy.