My Secret Soap Opera Addiction

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After a day like today, I just want to sink into my couch, put up my feet, and turn on my soap opera. There’s something about a fictional town with larger-than-life gossip that helps me escape the stressors in life.

But for some reason, I feel embarrassed to say it out loud–like you might think less of me because I spend about an hour a day catching up with the heroes and villains of daytime television. So I’ve kept it a secret.

I mean, it’s not like I have an identical twin who took my place while I was in a coma. And I’m not involved in a decade’s long love triangle. I don’t know anyone with an inoperable brain tumor and my arch enemy doesn’t need my perfect-match kidney.

But my toddler did scream for two solid hours today while driving on the turnpike. Then she threw her dinner on the floor. And she used every stall tactic in the book before I wrestled her to bed. All while my husband was out-of-town.

So instead of working out or practicing the life-changing magic of tidying up, I’m catching up on General Hospital. For such a small town, there’s a lot of drama.

Even if you’ve never watched GH, you have probably heard of Luke and Laura.

Let me get you up to speed…

There’s a serial killer who met his demise in a fire many years ago, but now he’s back, leaving bodies in his wake and running across a footbridge with his bride-to-be, who happens to be the mother of one of his latest victims. Then there’s a guy who decided to fake a DNA test to win back his ex-wife, but his sister-in-law is on to his game. Meanwhile, that same sister-in-law is currently dating her late husband’s recently discovered half-brother. And I didn’t even mention Sonny, Stone Cold, and the mob.

As a longtime viewer, I can tell you that nothing good ever happens on a footbridge, the DNA results will come to light, and that couple will probably get married–and then divorced and then married again. But I want to see it unfold and build upon the previous story lines.

It’s all very complicated and surprisingly simple. I watch for the characters, who have become a little bit like friends. I want to know what’s happening in their lives and who is going to give the best thousand-mile stare before the commercial break. They fill my cup, so to speak.

That’s why I knew that I had to get a ticket to General Hospital fan event a few weeks ago. I met seven members of the cast, which honestly sparked a wedding-day-like-euphoria in my soul. Naturally, I posted evidence on Instagram, and two of my good friends made comments about being fans of the show. Say what? We had never discussed it, and there were plenty of opportunities.

General Hospital Fan Event in Pittsburgh 2019

So I’m putting it out there. I love that soap characters pace their lavish apartments in high heels, even though they expect to be alone all day. I love that they talk to themselves in the mirror as a way to reveal key plot details to the audience. I even love the ubiquitous slap across the face.

While you’re waiting for the next season of your favorite show to drop, I can watch a new episode every day on Hulu. Or skip a month and still know what’s going on. It’s exactly what I need at the end of a very long day.

Are you a soap opera fan? Leave a comment for me!