The Mom Guilt

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As a mom, in general, we become so focused on our children that many times we forget that we had an identity before. Guess what moms, we all were something before we became moms, and sometimes we need to focus on ourselves and take off our mom hat even if its just for an hour.

It is OK to take time out and do something for yourself or go on a date night with your husband. We need time away from our kids to focus on ourselves so that we can become better moms.

I remember the first time I left my newborn to go out to dinner. He was four weeks old and my mom convinced my husband and I to walk to a local Mt Lebanon restaurant. I’m not sure how we managed a nice sit down dinner in 45 minutes but somehow we did! I couldn’t bear being away from him for any longer. I felt so guilty being way from my child, but moms need to remember that we do have an identity besides being a mom!

Fast forward five years, and three kids later, I still have guilt when I leave my kids to do things for myself. As a WAHM, my daily routine revolves around feedings kids, driving kids, coordinating appointments, and trying to manage a business at the same time. It is hard to take time out to myself because I feel guilty about doing it.

I joined a monthly massage program at a local salon after my first son was born almost five years ago. It took me four years of going to finally turn off my cell phone for an hour. After my appointments, my mom noticed I always seemed more stress then before my massage and asked me why? I finally confessed that I was so overcome with guilt getting a massage because I felt so guilty for taking time out to pamper myself. I loved getting the massage but the entire time I was worried I was going to get a phone call from preschool or thinking about how I should be using that money on groceries instead, that I actually built up more stress.  It was finally then that I felt the burden off my shoulders and realized that it is ok to take time for ourselves. Guess what, my kids  probably also enjoy time away from me too 🙂 Our kids also need to see that mom can enjoy time by herself as well!

No matter what stage of motherhood, you are in you are going to feel the “mom guilt” but guess what ladies your kids are going to survive being away from you and YOU deserve a break!!

 

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Maggie Poole
Maggie Poole is a Texas native that ended up in Pittsburgh after meeting her husband while working in Disney. They became college sweethearts and got married directly after college where they both worked on the road in the oil and gas industry. She is now a mom of three, two boys and a girl and co-owns a personalized children clothing and gifts boutique. Her kiddos keep her extremely busy and states that she lives in a state of blessed chaos. Her journey in motherhood has exposed her to not only pregnancy but she also got to experience the blessing of adopting a true miracle. She is active member of her church and a local philanthropy women’s group that keeps her busy. Her family loves to travel and she’s not afraid to pack up her kids for spare of the moment adventures!